weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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