porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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