Porn is love you can see.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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