So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
