weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
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