i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
