After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
