But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
