she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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