but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
