Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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