I cut my penus on the lid.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
