another moral hangover. fuck.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
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