yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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