I am in a vortex of obligation.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
