$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
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