Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
