I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
