I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
