We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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