My sheets look like a crime scene.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
