That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
