so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
