I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
