so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize
