no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
