I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
