i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
