ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
