? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
