You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Can I color on your dick again?
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Randomize
