evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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