sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
