and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
