nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Randomize
