went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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