yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
