problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
