I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
