I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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