i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
