There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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