didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Randomize
