You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Randomize
