Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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