An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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