With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
