you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
