I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
