Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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